Even the crypto crook got less porridge than this …
The sinister-looking envelope which landed in our letterbox had an air of menace about it the moment I set eyes on it.
And that was even before I’d opened the beastly brown brute.
With some trepidation, it was eventually torn open, and a quick scan revealed my worst fears.
Over one and a half pages there were blood-curdling threats of prosecution and a whopping great fine if I didn’t comply with the sender’s instructions.
Hell’s teeth, I thought, Sam Bankman-Fried the 32-year-old crypto crook got less when he was convicted of £6.3 billion wire fraud and money laundering.
My crime?
The ancient oak tree at the top of our garden had died about 18 months ago and we’d received notice to have it felled.
Trees like this can stand for decades without causing any trouble. But no, its very presence, the letter intimated, was about to bring the universe to an end. So, it had to go.
And so it was that four weeks ago, down it came – a sad end for such a graceful specimen and true force of nature.
I counted the rings last weekend, in fact, I counted them for times just to be sure and they told me that the old giant was 220 years old.
A mere tiny sapling when Nelson was shot at Trafalgar.
And there it had stood, quietly and serenely watching over our little patch of paradise for over two centuries.
We can only wonder at the changes the giant but gentle old sentinel must have witnessed in those long years.
And now she’s gone.
Things that stick around do form a strong bond. And much stronger than fleeting messages that appear and disappear in moments.
Something to think about when you’re looking for marketing collateral that has a bit of staying power.
Have a great week.
Alec